• Ayee

Beginnings and Endings

Updated: May 24

Nothing about me is normal...

I am born of revolutionaries from both bloodlines - Filipino & Basque...

Blood that have refused subjugation & subordination & have, throughout time, insisted & fought for autonomy, independence & sovereignty.

At a young age I sought the same liberation in mind & body spearheading wellness programs both in the workforce as well as the public thru environment & wellness programs that helped detox the earth & man, led by senior instructors who trained me in metaphysics for more than 12 years - another study that teaches about personal autonomy & self-ownership.

I’ve played with the media & image using it to help the country’s heritage & tourism for as long as I could, til slowly the road veered towards self-study & self-application - from serving the world to serving the home & personal dreams.

For a long time I wondered if people could relate to it.. if people could love as much as I. If they could devote & uphold values as much as I - that I would complain, thinking they don’t care or understand.

I measured my value based on how they understood & valued me cos I wondered where else the appreciation or validation would come from. And of course value was there appreciation was there - just different from mine. And just because I don’t see myself mirrored in their eyes, I need not take it against myself, anymore.

Most my life, I’ve always wanted or longed to see myself reflected in another... to feel myself from someone else’s skin... to see myself mirrored in someone else’s eyes - to affirm my being or existence.

And it’s always the snowflakes that remind you that won’t ever happen - cos no one is the same - & no one can see you the way only you can know or see yourself - & that is a good thing.

That is your power.

For so long I’ve longed to be loved as I love or accept as I accept I realize it is only me that needs to love, embrace & accept myself - & let other people be - cos they have enough struggles managing, loving & accepting themselves or me - & I could cut us both or all some slack &. need not impose my manner of loving.

Sometimes you just don’t really know what you think you know- even if you know it - until you actually do. And the moment finds you naked covering yourself feeling silly. We don’t need to collide to feel our space & presence.

We can spin in our own orbits & appreciate each other without needing to touch or possess because that is the natural design.

Leave it to yoga to remind me physically as well as psychically what I’ve always known...

Connecting synapses as with parts of myself once disenfranchised or disconnected so I can once again see, perceive & appreciate... as if for the first time ... Me.

The mat as my mirror.

The movement the spinning dance inward into ever awareness with the breath to gauge & control.

And I am the magic.

The hate stops here.

The Love begins & ends here.

The alpha & the omega.


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